A Shore Thing

May 10, 2016

So it’s May and Memorial Day is on the way and already the beach talk has started. Which is great except for the beach part because I’m not a huge beach person. I love the friends and the food, the swimming and the Frisbees, but the sand makes me crazy, the wind is worse, and that freakin’ sun is a killer. And that’s about 75% of what’s waiting on the other side of those dunes.

I am always officially on the fence about the beach trips my peeps plan. Or at least I used to be before I found my two BBFFs (best beach friends forever). Now I’ll go anytime anyone is ready because I’ve got what it takes to beat the bummers.

I will not go without my Sport-Brella. No way. No how. Because this thing is amazing. Think a giant semi-umbrella that turns into a sort-of-tent. Open it, tilt it, tie it, and in a minute or two you’re throwing all the right kinds of shade. Perfect for a sun-sensitive girl like me.

My friends call it my cabana. I call it my shore thing. I move it with the sun to keep cool. I open its windows when I need a breeze. Or I use it to block the wind altogether. Rain, too. It’s a little heavy, but it still carries over my shoulder without me feeling like a pack mule. Love. It.

That and an old twin fitted sheet gets me where I need to go. Which sounds completely stupid, I know, but don’t judge me yet. Because when I stretch that sheet out and wedge a cooler, my beach bag and whatever else I’ve got into its corners to keep it expanded, its sides stay up and turn into walls, and those walls form a sand-free oasis, a kind of magic anti-sandbox that beats what I don’t like about the beach.

I know, right? Brilliant! (Thanks for the trick, Mom!) Under my Sport-Brella, with a chair in the middle, I’ve got a budget beachfront condo. All I’m missing is a good book and a cabana boy to bring me a mojito.